King of Horror: The Exorcist

Allow me to introduce myself, I am the King of Horror. How did I gain such notoriety and fame? Well, here are my credentials:

• been watching horror movies since the age of 3
• still watching horror movies
• subscription to Fangoria (although with the advent of the internet i never renewed my subscription)
• read most of Stephen Kings books
• love the genre with all my bloody, pumping heart

You will see that I am very critical of the movies I watch these days, since I just don't have the time I used to (This happens when you decide to reproduce). Which is why I would like to begin this blog by talking about the KING OF ALLLLLLL HORROR MOVIES: THE EXORCIST.

THE EXORCIST is the King of Horror films because it contains all my criteria for a perfect horror movie, hell, it contains all the criteria for a perfect movie...period. Before I get into exactly what that criteria is....this is how bad ass this movie was:

• Nominated for 10 Academy Awards including Best Picture in 1973 (it won for Best Sound and Best Adapted Screenplay)
• It is the highest grossing horror movie of all time
• At the time, it became the highest grossing film of all time (i mean in terms of dollars not grossing you out)
• Not surprisingly, it was selected to be preserved by the Library of Congress

No other horror film comes close to those achievements (and please don't say SILENCE OF THE LAMBS, that's a thriller not a horror movie).

Now, here is the King of Horror's criteria for a great horror film:

• Great Story: involves character development, crisis, resolution.
• Disturbing imagery, yes, those images that stay in your head and wake you in the middle of the night.
• Disturbing sound, no other horror film made me close my eyes and cover my ears.
• Creepy music

How THE EXORCIST achieves my criteria:

• Great Story: the first 90 minutes of the film is basically a drama. As a 13 year old, I identified with Regan, and I did not touch an Ouija Board until the age of 16 ;). As an adult, I identified with both her mother and Father Karras. How horrific to see your child going through such a thing. Father Karras, is a true character of us all, always at conflict with good and evil. At conflict with the world and our inner world.
  
  
• Disturbing imagery: head turning scene, the spider walk (found on the re-released version), the hideous demonic face that the legendary Dick Smith created, the crucifix scene (i know you know what i'm talking about...."Let Jesus xxxx you"), the statue of the Virgin Mary blasphemed by phallic vandalism (i just coined that term), demonic Regan laughing on the bed as Father Karras tries to resuscitate Father Merrin.
  
  
• Disturbing Sound: like I said, few movies nail this one, and it is all due to one woman: Mercedes McCambridge. She was the voice of the demon and the raspy breathing you hear. This was achieved by the fact that she was a chain smoker and suffered from bronchitis. I always prayed I didn't hear that voice in my bedroom.
  
  
• Creepy Music: Can't you hear it now?

My Catholic mother waited an entire year to see the movie because she was pregnant of me when it was released. Her mother warned her about seeing it while pregnant with me....I guess it didn't work, look what I have become.

This movie still stands the test of time. Yes, I did attend the re-release premiere in the year 2000 in Hollywood where I met Elvira and Linda Blair. I asked Linda about something that I had been wondering for years. Was that her actual tongue in the scene where she is on the bed sticking it out at the priest as he is exorcising her? And she said "To put your mind to rest, no that was not my tongue, they used an attachment". Oh darn, that was kind of sexy if it would have been her tongue.

I praised the addition of the Spider walk scene. The elements that make it disturbing is the unnatural distortion of the human figure and the speed at which it descends the stairs. I personally like the version of the Spider walk scene, in which Regan sticks her pointy, demonic tongue out and quickly crawls to her mother. I recently watched the re-released version on a DVD and was disappointed that it has been changed to show Regan growl and blood gush out of her mouth. First off, why the hell is blood gushing out of her mouth? Oh wait, to appeal to the gory lovers of garbage like SAW.

I must also add, it is one of the very few movies that matches and even surpasses the book. When I read the book, I was not saying "well, the book was much better". The movie truly brought the book to life.

Unless I get my act together and write the script myself, THE EXORCIST will never be dethroned as the KING OF ALLLLLLL HORROR MOVIES!!!!

Join me in my appreciation, my passion for all things horror...I am the KING OF HORROR!!